[That's because it is self-loathing talk, my friend. And hearing the "l" word there gets him to uncomfortably squirm for a second because that sure isn't a word thats normally used to apply to him.]
Yes, well... I've been lucky that you've seen me here only on my better days, usually.
[Like when he's not trying to kill someone or having a freak out of some kind.]
[But he still seems extremely unconvinced that it would ever be a good idea for Grimm to see what he's like during a "bad" day to be Danny here. People tend to get hurt when that happens, whether it be others or himself.]
[Danny opens his mouth as if to object again... but then he closes it, instead smiling a little.]
I... thank you. That actually makes me a little happy to hear.
[Being cared about, he means. He's still certain that Grimm will want nothing to do with him if and when he ever finds out about Danny's past doings, but... he can't deny it's a nice thought to consider otherwise.]
[And he gently pulls Danny in for a kiss - a longer one this time, if he's permitted. He knows it's not Iris, but it was never only about Iris. At least, not in his mind.]
[He will indeed be permitted to do so this time, because why talk about Danny's self-loathing issues when they could be kissing instead, right? A much better use of time as far as Danny is concerned here, and given the amount of effort being put in it, it does seem to be something that Danny enjoys rather than being categorized alongside those fake smiles he tends to have.]
[Kissing is a much better activity than self-loathing, it's true. Grimm runs a hand through Danny's hair as the kiss deepens, gently. He's even warmer than usual, and no doubt Danny can feel the body heat radiating off him at this distance.]
[He does certainly notice that, and again, his mind circles back to wondering if it is Iris cycle right now and he somehow just didn't notice or feel any different this time.
Still, it's not a bad warmth, and he likes the hand in his hair, even leans closer into the touch as he puts his hands on Grimm's face, thumbs touching those scars over his eyes. Grimm doesn't exactly have hair for us to run our hands through, but this should be considered a fair enough exchange, right?]
[It's a fair trade. Those scars are sensitive, and Grimm shivers despite the heat between them. When he pulls back to speak, there's barely an inch between their lips.]
Would you like to retire to my room?
[He has a roommate, after all, it's inconsiderate to get too frisky out here.]
[Danny blinks at the question, wondering why Grimm suggested that... before he does suddenly remember that Grimm does indeed have a roommate, and not just any roommate, but Lobco, one of his own patients who definitely probably doesn't need to be seeing her therapist making out with her roommate if she were to walk in on them right now.
Somehow that thought is way more terrifying than being invited to Grimm's bedroom, in all honesty.]
[Technically this means Lobco is Helping. By giving him something else to be afraid of instead of intimacy.
Grimm takes Danny's hand to lead him to his bedroom. He doesn't have to, it's not like Danny can get lost in their one hallway, but he wants to hold hands for two seconds. Let him live.]
[Danny allows the hand holding because honestly, even if it's impossible to get lost, its a little more grounding in the realization that we are indeed about to be in someone's bedroom other than our own.
He kind of assumes it'll have a similar goth aesthetic though, so admittedly, he is curious to see it for that reason.]
[It does indeed have a similar aesthetic, with red lights and deep red curtains. Notable perhaps is that the bed, soft as it appears, looks very much un-slept-in - it's here for banging, not for sleeping.
Gently, Grimm leads Danny to sit down on the bed.]
[He's observant enough to notice that detail, but then remembers what he heard about Grimm being considered a God of Nightmares, and then that sort of makes sense why the bed doesn't appear to be one that was slept in.]
... A little.
[He will actually admit to that, even if it is a little embarrassing. He hasn't been intimate with someone in their bedroom for... a long time. Possibly never depending on if Episode 0 suddenly crawls out of the woodwork to say so, who knows.]
[The affirmation of taking this slowly, and the resulting kiss against his jaw and the part of his neck Grimm is able to reach he means. He reaches his hands back up where he had them before on the couch, though he's moved one hand to put against the back of Grimm's neck, while the other is the one that returns to touching his face, gently moving his thumb up and down them to feel the groove of the scar against his skin.]
[It's a deep and old scar, and it makes Grimm shudder when it's touched so gently. Danny has located one (1) weak spot.
Good, he says, so Grimm dots more kisses over his skin. Carefully, he reaches to undo Danny's tie and pull it off of him, setting it neatly to one side. He thumbs at the first button of his shirt, waiting for permission.]
[Danny is a weirdo who wears a lot of layers though, he's going to need to remove the coat and vest too first. When Grimm gets to the last remaining layer though of his shirt, he does hesitate momentarily, but... well.
Angela saw his scars a few days ago, and she didn't seem to find them ugly. And that was his co-worker... if Grimm likes him as much as he says he does, then maybe he won't either? At least that's the thought that manages to crawl past the usual sludge of self-loathing that takes up residence in his mind half the time.
So he nods, and drops his hands down and out of the way to let Grimm start trying to remove his shirt. Upon doing so, Grimm will finally get to see Danny's scars he had been hiding under there in the form of what appears to be old stab wounds, a gun shot wound... shots from bolts fired out of a crossbow, if Grimm is capable of recognizing that sort of thing. Danny has sort of averted his gaze towards the wall behind Grimm's head once his scars are out in the open, because there is the underlying fear regardless that even though Grimm has scars, at least his are debatably cool. Ours just makes us look worse, he thinks.]
There are a lot of scars here. Grimm can understand how and why Danny might be concerned that he would be found ugly, but - Grimm places soft kisses over his scars, each and every one of them in turn.]
[Well now you see why he wears so many fucking layers all the time, Grimm.
The press of lips against the scars, along with the words, cause a strange sort of hitch in his breathing. Not quite the "turned on" hitch (tho, he is kind of turned on by this right now), but dangerously close to the kind you hear from someone who might be trying to not start crying.
Partly relief that Grimm didn't say something bad about them, and partly from how undeserved that relief is, because he isn't lovely at all, the scars are proof of that. That he's someone most people want nothing to do with, and for good reasons. Not that he plans on telling him what those reasons are, but it's still an ugly feeling of guilt that weighs heavy in his chest upon hearing those words.]
[That just makes him actually cry, and for a moment he brings a hand up, using the heel of his palm to try to get his eyes to stop doing that right the fuck now.]
I'm--I'm sorry, that's not what I meant to do. Just... give me a minute.
[This is embarrassing, and he hates that he didn't shove that emotion straight down to the bottom of his priorities until he was alone and could deal with it then rather than in front of Grimm here.]
[No, he won't, because Grimm will eventually find out someday the things he's done, both at home, and even still doing here to some degree. It's an inevitability, simply a matter of "when" rather than "never" finding out, he thinks.
But Danny doesn't say anything, instead allows himself to lean against Grimm and (perhaps selfishly) accept the close hold being given here as he breathes and tries to regain whatever semblance of calm he's capable of that doesn't involve crying. It takes more than the allotted minute he had asked for, but when he finally speaks again, he does at least sound like he's managed something close to "okay" again.]
... I'm sorry. That was... really embarrassing of me there...
[He is worried however that he might have just killed the mood a fair bit with that.]
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Yes, well... I've been lucky that you've seen me here only on my better days, usually.
[Like when he's not trying to kill someone or having a freak out of some kind.]
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[self-loathing can fite him]
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[But he still seems extremely unconvinced that it would ever be a good idea for Grimm to see what he's like during a "bad" day to be Danny here. People tend to get hurt when that happens, whether it be others or himself.]
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[It's not the l word again, but it is Feelings.]
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I... thank you. That actually makes me a little happy to hear.
[Being cared about, he means. He's still certain that Grimm will want nothing to do with him if and when he ever finds out about Danny's past doings, but... he can't deny it's a nice thought to consider otherwise.]
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[And he gently pulls Danny in for a kiss - a longer one this time, if he's permitted. He knows it's not Iris, but it was never only about Iris. At least, not in his mind.]
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Still, it's not a bad warmth, and he likes the hand in his hair, even leans closer into the touch as he puts his hands on Grimm's face, thumbs touching those scars over his eyes. Grimm doesn't exactly have hair for us to run our hands through, but this should be considered a fair enough exchange, right?]
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Would you like to retire to my room?
[He has a roommate, after all, it's inconsiderate to get too frisky out here.]
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Somehow that thought is way more terrifying than being invited to Grimm's bedroom, in all honesty.]
I... yes, okay. We should do that.
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Grimm takes Danny's hand to lead him to his bedroom. He doesn't have to, it's not like Danny can get lost in their one hallway, but he wants to hold hands for two seconds. Let him live.]
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He kind of assumes it'll have a similar goth aesthetic though, so admittedly, he is curious to see it for that reason.]
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Gently, Grimm leads Danny to sit down on the bed.]
Nervous, my friend?
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... A little.
[He will actually admit to that, even if it is a little embarrassing. He hasn't been intimate with someone in their bedroom for... a long time. Possibly never depending on if Episode 0 suddenly crawls out of the woodwork to say so, who knows.]
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That is alright. We can go as slowly as you like.
[He presses soft kisses over Danny's jaw and neck, each one feather-light.]
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[The affirmation of taking this slowly, and the resulting kiss against his jaw and the part of his neck Grimm is able to reach he means. He reaches his hands back up where he had them before on the couch, though he's moved one hand to put against the back of Grimm's neck, while the other is the one that returns to touching his face, gently moving his thumb up and down them to feel the groove of the scar against his skin.]
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Good, he says, so Grimm dots more kisses over his skin. Carefully, he reaches to undo Danny's tie and pull it off of him, setting it neatly to one side. He thumbs at the first button of his shirt, waiting for permission.]
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Angela saw his scars a few days ago, and she didn't seem to find them ugly. And that was his co-worker... if Grimm likes him as much as he says he does, then maybe he won't either? At least that's the thought that manages to crawl past the usual sludge of self-loathing that takes up residence in his mind half the time.
So he nods, and drops his hands down and out of the way to let Grimm start trying to remove his shirt. Upon doing so, Grimm will finally get to see Danny's scars he had been hiding under there in the form of what appears to be old stab wounds, a gun shot wound... shots from bolts fired out of a crossbow, if Grimm is capable of recognizing that sort of thing. Danny has sort of averted his gaze towards the wall behind Grimm's head once his scars are out in the open, because there is the underlying fear regardless that even though Grimm has scars, at least his are debatably cool. Ours just makes us look worse, he thinks.]
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There are a lot of scars here. Grimm can understand how and why Danny might be concerned that he would be found ugly, but - Grimm places soft kisses over his scars, each and every one of them in turn.]
You are lovely, Daniel. Scars and all.
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The press of lips against the scars, along with the words, cause a strange sort of hitch in his breathing. Not quite the "turned on" hitch (tho, he is kind of turned on by this right now), but dangerously close to the kind you hear from someone who might be trying to not start crying.
Partly relief that Grimm didn't say something bad about them, and partly from how undeserved that relief is, because he isn't lovely at all, the scars are proof of that. That he's someone most people want nothing to do with, and for good reasons. Not that he plans on telling him what those reasons are, but it's still an ugly feeling of guilt that weighs heavy in his chest upon hearing those words.]
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I adore you. There is no need to cry.
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I'm--I'm sorry, that's not what I meant to do. Just... give me a minute.
[This is embarrassing, and he hates that he didn't shove that emotion straight down to the bottom of his priorities until he was alone and could deal with it then rather than in front of Grimm here.]
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[Grimm's wings wrap around Danny, more warmth to hold him close.]
You will always be beautiful in my eyes.
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But Danny doesn't say anything, instead allows himself to lean against Grimm and (perhaps selfishly) accept the close hold being given here as he breathes and tries to regain whatever semblance of calm he's capable of that doesn't involve crying. It takes more than the allotted minute he had asked for, but when he finally speaks again, he does at least sound like he's managed something close to "okay" again.]
... I'm sorry. That was... really embarrassing of me there...
[He is worried however that he might have just killed the mood a fair bit with that.]
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